Episode #50: Preparing your heart for the new year

To start the new year, let’s feed our hearts truth and hope for the new year by replacing long-held — but untrue — beliefs with what Jesus says.

What you really want at the start of a new year is hope. While I cannot promise only goodness in this new year, I can give you hope and freedom to start the year with a fresh perspective, one built on truth and love. In this episode, we’ll examine four statements that try-hard girls believe and we’ll replace them with truth.

You want to start and live this year with your feet firmly planted on what is true.

If you’re ready to speak truth to your heart,

If you’re ready for hope and freedom,

If you’re ready to start the new year with grace,

Listen in.

Today, we’re going to get hope, freedom, grace, and truth as we carefully examine these 4 lies:

I should…
If I really loved Jesus/people, I would…
I need to be able to point to a finished product to show my value.
There’s nothing I can do about…

We’ll unpack:

What is true about each statement
What isn’t true
And your next most gracious step.

I sprinkle in a few personal examples and share conversations I’ve had with Jesus.

Belief #1: I should…

“Shoulds” are a tangled web because they sound very much like something Jesus would say,

yet they make you feel heavy instead of light. However, “shoulds” rarely bring you closer into alignment with the Jesus-expression of yourself

Let’s break down “the shoulds:”

The truth is there is work for you to do. God says He pre-planned good work for you with your name on it. Doing God’s good work blesses you and conforms you more and more into the image of Christ.

The lie is that everything that crosses your path is for you to do at this season and stage of life. These lies come in the form of external expectations and demands that do not serve you well and drain you instead of giving you joy and peace.

Your most gracious next step is to bring Jesus your list of “shoulds” and talk with Him about them. This may take you many, many conversations to iron out, depending on how long the list is.

Belief #2: If I loved Jesus or people, I would…

Let’s break down guilt-inducing statements:

The truth is: loving Jesus means obeying Him, love moves us to action. In John 14:15 — after Jesus washed His disciples’ feet and talked about His impending death, Jesus tells His followers this, “If you love me, you will do the things I command.” Jesus’ heart is all about serving and sharing information with His friends.

It is true if you love Jesus, you obey Him. You will do what He says. Followers of Christ not only love others through words but through deeds. Those who love Jesus, shine a light to the world around them, never keeping it to themselves.

The lie is how this truth is twisted from loving Jesus means obeying Him, to loving a leader means obeying him/her. You may have been told directly – or you’ve picked up on subtle messaging by church leaders or other Christians in different ways — what people who love Jesus do.

Your most gracious next step is to ask Jesus about the statements you’re hearing about serving and tithing, and asking Him what He wants you to do.

Belief #3: I need to be able to point to a finished product to show my value.

Let’s break down the achievement mindset:

The truth is that God created good works for you to do. Jesus’ brother James tells us that we are to be do-ers of the word not just hearers of the word. Yes, doing is wired into the DNA of God’s kids.

The lie is that your value comes from what you’re doing, how much you achieved and how successful you are. Bonus points if in a good, old-fashioned game of comparison with others, you come out on top.

Your most gracious next step is to be open-handed in this season and in your life.

Belief #4: There’s nothing I can do about…

Let’s break down the discouraged mindset:

The truth is one person cannot stop a global pandemic on her own, one person cannot repair and restore centuries of despicable and unequal treatment of an entire race, and one person who knows how to handle her words online can’t change the behavior of everyone else on the internet.

The truth is that God calls us to this: whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.

We are to think of Jesus — because truth, nobility, righteousness, purity are who Jesus is and then we are to act.

The lie our enemy wants you to believe is that because you cannot fix everything, you might as well camp out in your despair and discouragement. Because your brain feels foggy and forgetful — not creative and energized — you decide that you’ll just put on your comfy pants and call it a day.

So your gracious next step is to ask Jesus what you can do. Where can you get involved? What can you do to love and serve people around you well? How can you care for an elderly neighbor while keeping her safe?

Key Quotes

“Shoulds” are a tangled web because they sound very much like something Jesus would say, yet they make you feel heavy instead of light.
Allow your Good Shepherd, who knows how He wired and knit you together, who knows your strengths, weaknesses, family and financial situation, who knows everything you have on your plate now and will in the future, to lead you with love.
Grace says that the cross paid for your sins and in the process, freed you from every “should” you will ever experience.
Jesus uses love and kindness to lead. He does not guilt you into anything.
It is a lie that tells you that you must have something outside of you that proves the worth inside of you.
The way of Jesus is to obey the Father, to love people, and to enter hard situations and engage with those who don’t know Him.
When you hear yourself say “should,” ask if this is something God has put on your heart or if it feels more like an obligation.
Every season has its own kind of productivity.
That voice inside your head that tells you you need to do more and try harder isn’t always the voice to listen to, even when it is the loudest.