#126: God, grace + emotions: Overcoming guilt with grace with Sara Peters

Ever felt bad because you said “no” to the cell phone or sleepover for your child, even when you knew it was the right choice? Ever felt like The Worst parent because you work, even if it’s a financial necessity? Maybe you’ve been guilted into serving on the PTA Board or spending Christmas with your in-laws.

Guilt seems to stick close like a shadow. So how can we handle guilt in real life?

Sara and I talk through

The difference between guilt and shame,
How to tease out if your guilt is warranted,
And signs you’re experiencing excessive guilt.

Key Quotes

“Guilt is produced when individuals evaluate their behavior as a failure.” – Licensed Professional Counselor Sara Peters
“Guilt often motivates us to seek restoration or repair in the relationship. Shame motivates the individual to hide and stay withdrawn.”- Licensed Professional Counselor Sara Peters
“Be open in feeling uncomfortable in asking yourself, ‘Where is this coming from?’” – Licensed Professional Counselor Sara Peters
“Guilt-tripping prevents healthy communication and conflict resolution.” – Licensed Professional Counselor Sara Peters
“Good boundaries are part of thriving relationships. Boundaries set in defensiveness, those can be harmful.” – Licensed Professional Counselor Sara Peters
“Are my actions or behaviors somehow justifying my goodness in the relationship?” – Licensed Professional Counselor Sara Peters
“We’re all going to be guilty of missing the mark, but if it starts spiraling into this piece of shame, I would ask, ‘Where is that self-condemnation coming from, and who does Jesus say that I am?’” – Licensed Professional Counselor Sara Peters
“Put the thought on trial.” – Licensed Professional Counselor Sara Peters
“Just because you think and feel things doesn’t mean it’s true.” – Licensed Professional Counselor Sara Peters

As Mentioned in the Podcast

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#101: Spiritual Health: Hearing from God for freedom with Jennifer Barnett

About Sara Peters

To help us in our conversation, Licensed Professional Counselor Sara Peters joins the show. Sara is a wife, daughter, sister, aunt, and life-long maker who always has a project in mind.

She and her husband can be found most Saturdays walking the local trail system with their two rambunctious dogs, Hank and Lacy. When she’s not wrangling dogs, spending time with family, or making something, Sara is a licensed professional counselor and board-certified art therapist in San Antonio, Texas.

She specializes in working with adolescent and young adult women who are bravely confronting life’s obstacles and discovering confidence, capability, and connection in the process. Sara also teaches art classes focused on the intersection of faith and self-expressive art.